Sunday, 22 June 2014

Can my body keep up?

"How are you doing?" somebody who hadn't seen me since March asked yesterday "Good"  I heard myself saying "Very Good" and this time I meant it.  It wasn't an empty "fine thanks" or "okay", my normal, - you don't really want to know - answers.  Yesterday was my 16th day in a row of feeling good.

Today is a little different, I still "feel" well, I don't feel ill, but my body feels like it's struggling to keep up.  My back is aching like mad and has been since last Wednesday, but it was a bit worse this morning.  I'm not sure what's caused that.  My thigh muscles are crying out to me and my knees aching.  For some reason my thigh muscles keep completely tightening up.  My physio and Ant have been massaging them for me at regular intervals - which is painful, but makes it better.  The tight muscles have the knock on effect of making my knees ache.  It feels like my body is falling apart, but I feel well - a strange contradiction, but I can understand after almost five years of not being able to do very much, for the past two weeks I have been asking a lot more of my body and parts of it are complaining!  I'm hoping that what I'm feeling here is deconditioning, but I don't know that, it could be that by pushing through I'm going to make things worse.  With this slightly in mind I have tried to have an easier day today, lots of sitting around in the garden reading books.  I've still managed to clock up 5400 steps, but that is a step down from my current 6884 daily average.

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